Tuesday, November 03, 2009

An environmentalist walks into a bar... (10 eco-jokes)

Posted by Mickey Z on 11/03 at 06:45 AM
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  1. Hey you forgot the Reagan-era one about ketchup being a vegetable...but that Dan Quayle one is a knee-slapper.

    I got one I usually tell as a feminist joke, but it’ll do:

    Q: How many environmentalists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
    A: That’s not funny.

    Posted by Keir from here and there  on  11/03  at  12:00 PM

  2. Congratulations MZ, you stumped me. Joking about the environment is like Rush Limbaugh trying out for Rams place kicker. “Two minutes on sea life poisoned with oil. Then three more on counting calories on a plastic diet. The closer is injecting toxins into the Earth’s crust to extract more toxins. These bits killed in Buffalo, then I went to Yellowstone on a snowmobile and killed another.” <cut to some slapdash research>

    A woman called her husband during the day and asked him to pick up some organic vegetables for that night’s dinner on his way home.

    The husband arrived at the store and began to search all over for organic vegetables before finally asking the produce guy where they were. The produce guy didn’t know what he was talking about, so the husband said: “These vegetables are for my wife. Have they been sprayed with poisonous chemicals?”

    “No, sir, you will have to do that yourself.”

    Q: How do oil companies deal with with tanker spills?
    A: Slick lawyers.

    All your funny are belong to us.

    Posted by Zen Prole from Pac NW  on  11/03  at  12:08 PM

  3. I’m here all week…

    Posted by Mickey Z. from Astoria  on  11/03  at  12:31 PM

  4. Q. How many liberals does it take to change a lightbulb?

    A. They can’t, they can only hope it does.

    Yuk yuk, I just made that up, you can tell.

    Posted by Andy from shanghai  on  11/03  at  01:43 PM

  5. I’ve been following the Obama-drama, aren’t we just supposed to BELIEVE that the lightbulb has changed, no matter what evidence points to the contrary?

    What did moths do before electric lighting?

    Posted by Rick (the Cartoonist) from England  on  11/03  at  02:49 PM

  6. I could’ve added two more eco-jokes by simply typing the names: Al Gore
    Barack Obama

    Posted by Mickey Z. from Astoria  on  11/03  at  02:53 PM

  7. Great Carlin joke, Mickey!  And the lightbulb joke is not bad either, keir ..

    Zen Prole #2: oil has now been spilling into the sea NW of Australia for a full 10 weeks - not that many ‘journalists’ care.  And the company running the oil rig doesn’t care much either.
    ‘Q: How do oil companies deal with with tanker spills?
    A: Slick lawyers.’ Too true.

    And greetings are extended to Andy and Rick from Daylesford where temperatures have dropped considerably:  a few days ago, we had 86F, and today:  68F.  A rollercoaster ride.

    Off to Melbourne to do a bit of X-mas shopping and spend some time with my mother-in-law.  Back in Daylesford and at this site on Saturday night.

    Take care, all of you,
    Helga

    Posted by Helga Fremlin from Daylesford, Australia  on  11/03  at  05:08 PM

  8. Oh, I got another one!

    Q: What do you get when you cross an environmentalist with direct action?
    A: Arrested!

    Posted by Keir from here and there  on  11/03  at  06:05 PM

  9. That reminds me of this from Shaw: “Anarchism is a game at which the police can beat you.”

    Posted by Mickey Z. from Astoria  on  11/03  at  06:43 PM

  10. http://www.instantrimshot.com

    Posted by Zen Prole from Pac NW  on  11/04  at  12:20 AM

  11. Thanks, everyone.

    A brand new post is now up.

    Posted by Mickey Z. from Astoria  on  11/04  at  05:15 AM

  12. Thanks for a good website with useful information.

    Posted by Matt from Bronx, NY  on  11/09  at  03:34 PM

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