Mickey Z
Cool Observer
Friday, December 09, 2005
Cindy Sheehan reads me, I read Ward Churchill, & a bunch of other stuff you're gonna like
thank you thank you.
no applause required. you just all have to let me know when you all of you come visit like cindy. to further this aim....i put a pic of glasgow on a few weeks ago but the bits i like better are out of the cities. an hour and a half in any direction and you get to see things like this all the time…
and i am not kidding. there really isn’t a filter on the cameraok tourist industry section over
as for cindy, well she is hanging about with a woman called rose gentle who has been doing the same sort of things over here that cindy is doing over there. and scotlands first minister (sort of like Prime minister, has less power but could do things different if he wanted and wasn’t a stooge of blair) refused to meet both of them. no surpises there then. they did a wee protest outside the parliament. rose actually went over to the US too.
it could be a new sport… “i have been ignored by politicians in X number of countries”
as for colombus. there is a bit in the intro to a peoples history which i don’t have to hand but off the top of my head
“to emphasise his navgational skill and fortitude and deemphasise genocide is not a structural(or educational or something) necessity, but an ideological choice”
Posted by michael on from scotland 12/09 at 07:54 AMExcellent photo, Michael. To “put” it mildly, I know very little about Scotland. Is that where they invented Scotch tape? (sorry)
As for Columbus, here’s something from an article I did: Upon encountering the Arawak people in 1492, Columbus noted that they “would make fine servants,” adding, “with fifty men we could subjugate them all and make them do whatever we want.”
(article: http://tinyurl.com/aww9q)Posted by Mickey Z. on from Astoria 12/09 at 08:08 AMi am quoting…
“Since before the Industrial Revolution, Scots have been at the forefront of innovation and discovery across a wide range of spheres: the steam engine, the bicycle, tarmacadam roads, the telephone, television, the transistor, the motion picture, penicillin, electromagnetics, radar, insulin and calculus are only a few of the most significant products of Scottish ingenuity.”
there is a theory as to why all this happened. a section of scottish society attacked and invaded england http://tinyurl.com/bbcdu .
bad move. they lost,badly, and then the scots were banned from speaking gaelic, wearing tartan or traditional clothing, traditional songs, music, culture and literature were suppressed. the theory goes that all the creative minds of the time were then diverted into other avenues of creativity.
when i was in asia i met some americans (peace corp) and we got to talking about all this and she point blank refused to belive me about the invention thing claiming they were all american. after a trip to a library and an internet cafe to prove what i was saying she said that i was subjecting her to scottish propaganda! my assertion that ‘scottish propaganda’ as opposed to US doesn’t really count didn’t seem to convince her.
anyway, enough of this historical nonsense.
a good resource if anyone wants to check back on bush adminisration statements RE iraq..
Posted by michael on from scotland 12/09 at 08:27 AMoh, and in caseit seems i am being patriotic or nationalistic or anything. i am not. we also assisted the english in some of the worst crimes in their empire and half of those inventions are responsible for the planet being f*cked.
Posted by michael on from scotland 12/09 at 08:28 AMMichael: Stunning photo—makes me want to visit Scotland immediately.
Posted by Hawk on from Boulder, CO 12/09 at 10:12 AMMickey: Thanks for the Ward Churchill exerpt, and I’m looking forward to more.
I’ve had Since Predator Came in a box since it came out—my father sent it to me to get Ward’s autograph on it, and I haven’t followed through yet. I mentioned to you somewhere else that, when I went to CU in the early-mid 90’s, I took five classes from Ward, and read half a dozen of his books. His COINTELPRO stuff was enlightening.
Posted by Hawk on from Boulder, CO 12/09 at 10:14 AMGreetings to all from the tundra. I have been near Albany NY for a couple of days. Was supposed to go home today but am now snowbound. I hope to get home ASAP.
Mudge be careful with that freshly killed venison. We all love you and want you to be healthy. Not too long ago there was a story up here about a hunter who ate his kill and died from a disease similar to mad cow disease.
Mickey, sounds like you did a great job with your talk. I agree about the population problem but maybe a distinction should be made between births in wealthy-consuming societies and in other cultures. Also, I am noticing that many men, and some women, don’t understand how powerful the maternal instinct is. Also, a long time ago I read an interesting article about why poor people have more children than many wealthy people. The explanation made a lot of sense to me.Posted by RMJ on from Albany 12/09 at 11:05 AMFirstly, huge props to Michael for his Cindy coup! Secondly, huge boos and hisses to Michael for the gorgeous photo of his beautiful but colder than a female Satanist’s mammary country. A trip to Speyside distilleries once upon a time convinced me of the beauty of Scotland. I’ve always had a soft ear for Scots accents. A bearded man in a kilt speaking with a Scots accent best be a fast runner or a chain smoker to escape me!
RMJ, the fresh-shot venison is processed and checked for whatever the deer version of mad cow is, which is why it’s so very expensive here. I can’t afford it, so no worries. I like it, though.
Sorry you’re stuck where it’s too cold for life to exist outside. I’m puling steadily because it was 20F this morning. That must seem positively balmy to you now.
Hey Hawk, how goes it? Took courses from Churchill? The lectures must have been very intense!
Posted by Mudge on from Dear, dead Austin 12/09 at 11:34 AMMornin’, Mickey & Michael & Hawk - and a special hello to Rosemarie… It’s cold there, near Schenectady, eh, RMJ? Visiting your daughter? Come home soon, my friend. Though you’d probably be good for the “Capital District,” Vermont needs you, too…
Great stuff this morning, Mickey. That could be Bigfoot, I suppose, though the outline is curiously reminiscent of Donald Rumsfeld…
Michael, had I been forced this morning, to “take a pop quiz,” I’d have answered that all those inventions and innovations were of American Origin. You’re one of the few folks I’ve encountered who seems to have a pretty accurate idea of the extent to which we, as a nation, tend to completely ignore, or at least relentlessly diminish, the rest of the planet…
I lived in Mexico City in 1980. Before I left San Francisco, a friend of mine told me he’d be glad to “help me out,” with things, while I was away. I asked him what he meant. He said: “You know. I could send you stuff - tylenol or whatever medicines, or I could get things Xeroxed (copied) for you… stuff like that.”
Hawk, your father reads Ward Churchill? Now, there’s a blessing I hope you remember to count, occasionally.
Posted by joe on from Oregon 12/09 at 11:55 AMG’Mornin’ to you, too, Mr. Mudge. I apologize for passing you by. Mudge, I just can’t quite picture you living in Texas. I guess I have a very perverse, cartoon-like view of the whole state. I’m sorry. However, in my mind’s eye, I see folks executed for minor traffic violations, or people being dragged behind automobiles, down dirt roads, for the crime of learning how to read…
When I first moved to Seattle, while at work, I talked to a guy in Manhattan, on the phone. I told him I’d lived in NYC for several years. He asked me what the hell I was doing in Seattle. He continued: “Whadda they got out there? They got… they got… trees!”Posted by joe on from Oregon 12/09 at 12:08 PMHi Mudge, Joe and all Expendables,
Ward enjoyed starting arguments between his well-off granola students. He’d get them going, then he’d saunter over to the window-wall of the classroom, where he’d crack a window and smoke a cigarette or two (no one in the Administration was brave enough to enforce the no-smoking ban when it came to Ward). Just when it looked like weapons or fists, he’d resume his lecture—always without notes, always with computer-like precision, always with the passion of a late-60’s protest speech. He did not need a bullhorn.
My ol’ man turned me onto Chomsky in the late 80’s. He started out as a Young Republican, fundamentalist Pentacostal, son of a tent preacher—and ended up a Presbyterian preacher working with migrant field workers and inner city (Inglewood, CA) gang kids. I lived with him in Moses Lake, Washington for a few years, during which time he had his door kicked in by INS stormtroopers accusing him of hiding illegals in the basement. He had no basement, and of course, there were no “illegals” in his house.
In the 80’s he traveled to Nicaragua as part of the Liberation Theology movement, and has been on the federal shit list ever since.
He just retired to southern New Mexico, so I get to see a lot more of him than during the last fifteen years. I do consider myself lucky, Joe.
Posted by Hawk on from Boulder, CO 12/09 at 12:10 PMHello Expendables. What started as a big snowstorm here in Astoria soon turned to rain and it’s now sunny and slushy.
RMJ: We missed you. As for the baby-related item, I realize it’s a flashpoint...but someone sent me that link and I thought it would be good to share.
Hawk: Around these parts, we do a little something called “Storytelling Saturday,” but yougot the jump with that excellent tale, re: Ward and your Dad. Tomorrow’s my Dad’s birthday. He’s not the Chomsky/Churchill type...but I do have a short funny story prepared.
Btw, Joe, pay no heed to Michael. If I’m not mistaken, I think an American invented Scotland. These outsiders “never” give us enough credit.
Posted by Mickey Z. on from Astoria 12/09 at 12:17 PMThanks for those stories, Hawk. Your father’s story makes me feel a little more hope for the human race…
The Churchill tale makes me want to spend a little time with the guy - maybe drink some coffee, smoke a few cigarettes, gab…Mickey, I think I read about our invention of Scotland - it was in the Rush Limbaugh’s History of the World, yes?
Most people don’t know about it, however, because our invention of Japan, immediately thereafter, caught everyone’s attention.Hey - a fine, sad death-penalty tale from Dave Zirin, at CounterPunch, this morning. Well worth a look:
Damn It.
Posted by joe on from Oregon 12/09 at 12:33 PMThanks for the Zirin link, Joe. I’d like to add that it includes an address if anyone can send a buck or two to the widow.
I’ve had the pleasure of getting to know Dave Zirin a bit and, as his telling of this story demonstrates, he’s a real human. One of the good guys for sure.
Posted by Mickey Z. on from Astoria 12/09 at 12:39 PMHey everyone-- cool post again, Mickey. No need for a 6,000,000,001st miracle, since it often seems like a miracle that you take time from your busy schedule to come up with this stuff each and every morning. Congratulations about Cindy Sheehan getting your book, and yeah, Wooden Soldiers was always a damn creepy movie, right up there for me with the winged monkeys on Wizard if Oz. For me, King Kong was always a Thanksgiving tradition which I’m bored of now, and I’m glad I don’t have to hear about that movie anymore. Fun discussion facial hair and veganism yesterday-- I’m all tapped out about the latter, except to say I’m really sick of hummus myself, but hey-- Goldenberg’s Peanut Chews are vegan, and who doesn’t like those? And oh yeah-- I was the Expendable presence at the Vegan with a Vengeance signing at Mooshoes last night. A lot of fun, really cool book from a cool author/chef/person, a good vegan counter to Emeril who makes me wish I had cable tv so I could see her show.
Joe, your idea from yesterday sounds great, just wish you could find yourself some non-corporate smokes (I mean I won’t even buy Boca Burgers because they’re owned by a cigarette company) which somehow didn’t cause cancer and heart disease… good luck either way!
Posted by James on from Hell's Kitchen 12/09 at 01:41 PMHi James - Let’s call us friendly foes, then, shall we? And, let me emphasize the word “friendly.”
Over the last few years, as a smoker, I’m often the recipient of expressions of sincere concern about my health. I’d be amazed, really, if I didn’t realize that all this is a corporate campaign, and - like most such truly magnificent PR campaigns, it’s very effective, very successful.
Now, see - here’s another view:
You, for example live in NYC. New York surely belches more toxic sludge into the world’s air and water each week, than do all the worlds cigarette companies and smokers, combined, in a year. Yet, your city & state taxes, your residence, your overall participation - no matter how “lightly” you step, all quite actively support this savaging of the environment. Moreover, you choose to remain within the center of this immense environmental hazard. Yet, you might feel a bit “harassed,” were you and Mickey suddenly the target of the nation’s collective “concern,” no matter how “sincere.”In addition, NYC is no mere berg. It’s a nation onto itself. And, no mere nation, but undoubtedly the economic epicenter of the earth. As such, the entire modern world, the “New World Order,” the vast despoiling of almost everything human and significant, everywhere, is to a great extent, originated in your home-town. One might expect, then, that - given your sincere concern for the health and well being of others - you would be packing up and rushing out and away. One might expect that your future efforts for the good of human-kind would include passionate and relentless attempts to help boycott all goods and services originating in the city, and to generally be working toward defeating this singular assault on life itself.
This vast attack on smokers - for, that’s what it is - almost certainly has almost nothing to do with hoping to improve people’s health or well being. There’s almost certainly nothing sincere about it at all…
But, then again, I tend to find that other people’s contribution to the world’s problems bother me much more than do my own. How about you?
Posted by joe on from Oregon 12/09 at 02:50 PMHello Everyone,
Today I have to make up for all the time I spent here & reading all the links, but I had to say that I agree with the ‘stop breeding’. It is a contentious issue, for sure, but I think too many start breeding without considering all the many and various consequences...to themselves, to the child(ren), to society, of changing society on the futures of their brood. Also couldn’t leave without mentioning that the Nobel prize was awarded to MacLeod (Scot) and Banting (Canadian) jointly for the insulin breakthrough.
Hope everyone has a great day - snowed in, or slushed in, or otherwise!
Posted by Amelopsis on from Snowy Canada 12/09 at 02:51 PMJoe, @ work so better be short-- but of course friendly, not even really foes-- concern for health is sincere on my part at least. Family members of mine could well be alive today if not for tobacco, but I can see that fascism’s not really the answer to all that. Though as MZ’s said, I too sure do like hanging out in bars a whole lot more since the ban. I don’t judge anyone myself, I have plenty addictive bad habits of my own (like websurfing at work...), just none similar to smoking, etc.
As for the eco-effects of big cities, NYC or otherwise, more complicated, another time…
Posted by James on from Hell's Kitchen 12/09 at 03:04 PMhello expendables all
since i am in mickeys good books todya i will use this opportunity to announce a major revamping of http://thumpingthetub.blogspot.com
and no, this isn’t the big project thats been in the works. not even close. but it looks better and now has a “mass murderer of the week” section too. check it out to find out this weeks winner!
Posted by michael on from scotland 12/09 at 03:10 PMExcellent post, Mickey! And thanks for the beautiful photo, Michael.
Robert Fisk speaks out about war and other things:
http://www.rabble.ca/rabble_interview.shtml?sh_itm=a37c84dbd62690c4c1abb1a898a77047&rXn=1&‘Kill one and you get lethal injection. Kill millions and you get a goddamned holiday named after you.’ Great quote, Mickey - is it from Ward Churchill’s latest book?
Thanks for brightening up my days - and hi to all of you MZ’ers.
I hope you all have a great weekend!Posted by Helga Fremlin on from Daylesford, Australia 12/09 at 03:19 PM‘Upon encountering the Arawak people in 1492, Columbus noted that they “would make fine servants,” adding, “with fifty men we could subjugate them all and make them do whatever we want.” ‘ I think SJ Gould quoted that in one of his books, Mickey! Thanks again for all those posts, excerpts, graphics, etc. etc.
Posted by Helga Fremlin on from Daylesford, Australia 12/09 at 03:27 PMHello gang.
Helga, I can say this is mine: ‘Kill one and you get lethal injection. Kill millions and you get a goddamned holiday named after you.’ The quote that begins “Upon encountering the Arawak people in 1492,” is from Zinn.
Michael: Nice renovation. Sadly, you not likely run out of candidates for your weekly war criminal.
I’ll be back soon…
Posted by Mickey Z. on from Astoria 12/09 at 03:31 PMoops , did i say mass murderer, of course i meant warmonger. can’t think what came over me
Posted by michael on from scotland 12/09 at 03:43 PMAnd ‘amelopsis’, I fully agree with the ‘stop breeding’ proposition. Re that maternal instinct, Rosemarie, it is very strong of course, but aren’t there enough bad mothers (and fathers) already? And what about all those unwanted pregnancies and tens of millions of kids living in the streets, especially in Third World countries? And nothing raises my hackles more than the vilification directed towards people who decide to remain childless by choice -if one ‘retaliates’ by asking people why they have kids, one gets such intelligent answers as: ‘One has to propagate the species’ and ‘It has always been like this - people just do have kids’. And how come one is trained for even the most basic tasks but there is no training for child-rearing? Just asking ...
Posted by Helga Fremlin on from Daylesford, Australia 12/09 at 03:48 PMAnd last (for now): I might make that my ‘quote of the day’, if you don’t mind, Mickey!
It’s overcast here in Dayesford, Australia but will stay dry for the day, or so the weather forecast says.Posted by Helga Fremlin on from Daylesford, Australia 12/09 at 04:00 PMI don’t mind at all, Helga...and thanks for sharing your thoughts on the topic of kids.
Posted by Mickey Z. on from Astoria 12/09 at 04:14 PMSpeaking of ‘war criminals’...
http://tinyurl.com/a5ltcOther good stuff from the Indy this week…
http://tinyurl.com/bqmg2
http://tinyurl.com/ajedl
http://tinyurl.com/7cab5And one especially for Scottish Michael
http://tinyurl.com/8w34uPosted by Mew on from England 12/09 at 04:30 PMHawk, I like your description of Churchill. I have heard similar stories about him. I guess that if I ever made a list of the 10 things that I want to do before I die, one wish would be to have a conversation with Churchill.
Helga I see what you and the others say about increasing the world population and there are certainly more than enough bad parents and far too many neglected children. My only point is that now that it is politically incorrect and thought to be socially irresponsible to have children, that there is another side to that debate. I agree that most people should not have children but these days the pendulum has swung so far to the “no babies” side of the argument that someone should speak up for the small minority who have children for the right reasons...and there are some right reasons. Sometimes I think that only very poor people should have children but every time I say that I get really beat up.... the poor need larger sized families in order to survive and also poor people use less of the world’s resources. On the other hand, I think that people should not have children to insure the survival of the family but I am unwilling to harshly judge those who do.
Sorry to not acknowledge everyone here today by name. I am dealing with major weather woes.Posted by RMJ on from Weather Woe Land 12/09 at 05:02 PMThis contains some “good shit”...aka Harold Pinter:s Nobel Lecture.
http://simurl.com/bb-ii-xx
I´m not so familiar with him (except watching some drama he wrote… on tv) but recently read this in text format.Posted by The poster formerly known as "Old Glen". on from 12/09 at 05:20 PMJames, you’re a mellow dude. I’m not, I’m afraid, so mellow when this topic arises. I feel as if I’ve been knee-deep in shit for a very long time, when it comes to smoking. I’ve experienced the equivalent of folks walking two blocks out of their way, then up a flight of stairs, then across a cat-walk, all to stand next to me and complain about “secondhand smoke.” I’m afraid my pistol is set for hair-trigger, when this stuff arises…
Now, James, I’m sincerely concerned about your hanging out in bars…Michael, the tub area looks very tasty, indeed. Nice work. “Renounce your liberties, or the terrorists win!” Great line, and an apt description of the Zeitgeist. The “What Do You Think?” section knocked me over. Big chuckles and good stuff everywhere…
Mickey, that’s a great line, also. But, hey, the US government has killed so many people that, perhaps, one holiday isn’t enough of a reward. Perhaps we can rename an entire season!?! (Or, maybe the second half of the 20th Century!)
Helga - I believe we saw some fire in your eyes, today. That’s the spirit! Before I married Suzanne, and acquired 3 wee-wons, I used to get harassed about being childless. People decided that I was just “too selfish,” to have children.
It often seemed to me that many people put more thought into the purchase of a TV, than they did to the thought of trying to create and raise a human being.
Of course, throughout the world, the problem is that people are just too “stupid” to “just say no” to the delights of sex. Instead, they whine on about needing condoms and contraceptives and a need for safe, effective abortions, if necessary.
Don’t they realize that, because of this whining, God hates them?Mew - thanks for the links. Great stuff, as usual. The article: “Acts of defiance against war turned ordinary people into criminals,” reminds me of an interesting article I read this morning. A well-behaved US high-school kid was tossed out of school, today, for speaking Spanish in the halls:
Thought I’d try one of these new-fangled idears…
Posted by joe on from Oregon 12/09 at 05:47 PMHi Rosemarie -
Still at Christine’s?
You’re right, that lotsa kids are necessary to help poor families survive. My folks grew up in the depression. Mom had 5 brothers. Dad had one brother and 3 sisters. All of them worked - hard, while still quite young. My father said that they never would have made it, otherwise.Around these parts, the little critters are everywhere. I haveta “spray,” to keep `em out…
Posted by joe on from Oregon 12/09 at 05:53 PMAll right, I’m stepping in to mediate. I say we pronounce the time period between Sept. 11 and Dec. 7 a National Holiday in America. Call them Military Motivation Months.
Next, we divide the the 50 states as such: 12 get cigarettes but no kids. 12 get kids but no cigarettes. 12 get kids and filtered cigarettes every other day. 12 get no kids or cigarettes but free cable. And it’s a friggin’ free-for-all in Nevada...anything goes except Dick Cheney. Finally, Hookah bars are banned in Astoria until further notice.
What would you folks do “without” me?
(P.S. Hello Glen and Mew)
Posted by Mickey Z. on from Astoria 12/09 at 06:07 PMthanks joe and everyone.
mickey, i have come up with similar solutions over here. not a week goes by in winter without some dimwitted f*ck getting stuck in the mountains. sometimes you can’t help it but often it’s their own fault. there was a case a couple of years ago about 2 guys who went up on the friday and had to be rescued. they then went up again on the sunday and had to be rescued again. can you imagine how pissed off you would be if you were the helicopter winchman?? theysold there story for 50,000 pounds and only gave 5000 back to the mountain rescue fund.
they should leave them up there.
i have also often said that we should all be really shitty to each other on christmas day and then we could get on with being nice to each other the other 364. that seems to make much more sense to me ‘than’ the way we currently do it.
Posted by michael on from scotland 12/09 at 06:19 PMUm...I forgot one state. Let’s see...okay, Utah: definitely no more kids, but it’s now mandatory for everyone over the age of 6 to smoke at least a pack a day.
Posted by Mickey Z. on from Astoria 12/09 at 06:20 PMMickey, you are a wonderful mediator. I like your plan. It reminds me of something that the “Car Guys” (Click and Clack) said once. They said that the only way to make things work would be for everyone in the country to organize into groups of 10 and make all of the rules for themselves.....In the future I promise to behave better and never mention the “baby” word ever again.....well, maybe for at least 24 hours.
Posted by RMJ on from in a snow drift 12/09 at 06:22 PMNow I’m going to move to Utah and start smoking cigars!
Posted by RMJ on from 12/09 at 06:24 PMInteresting stuff today, sorry to join late, and with a little (personal) bad news. Not for the first time, probably not the last, I got roughed up on the street. This time they were “kids"---three of them, 20 years old or so, and drunk. And the only reason my face is in one piece is they decided not to plant their fists in it. (My back got a whack though, and is gonna kill in the morning.) These things happen so fast that you don’t remember all the details, but I do recall saying more than once “sorry” and “hey, no problem” while getting shoved around. I’m able to tell you about it because, inexplicably, they decided not to relieve me of my precious laptop, which I was carrying with me. Welcome to the city of International Justice. I don’t want any sympathy, but hopefully I will have a more substantive reaction to the whole thing at my place in the next few days.
Anyway.
Michael, somewhere I heard that on days like Thanksgiving, Christmas, Superbowl Sunday and Valentine’s Day in the States the rate of violence against women rises significantly. Let’s leave it the way it is: be shitty to each other 364 days a year, and then shitty to each other on Christmas.
Posted by Keir on from The Hague 12/09 at 06:58 PMshit man. hope your not too shook up. is where you are known for that?
Posted by michael on from scotland 12/09 at 07:02 PMWhere? Planet Earth? Yeah, you see this type of shit all the time here. Especially in places with, um, immigrants. Oh wait....damn! I’m one of ‘em.
It’s “nothing”. Really.
Posted by Keir on from The Hague 12/09 at 07:08 PMUtah without children is like...well, I dunno, but something really, really weird and very very good. Anyone remember their Lovecraft? Being in Salt Lake City for 72 hours made me wish fervently that Cthulu lived in the Great Salt Lake.
Ciao, y’all, been out doing errands in the cloudy 40F loveliness.
Michael. The new site looks WONDERFUL! It’s probably a good thing you live in Scotland, I’d be under your window every night making plaintive noises and offering barrels of Guinness and stacks of cigarettes in longing tribute if you didn’t.
Hey MZ. What up?
Joe, m’man! Irritating to be holier-than-thoued, ain’t it? I’m on record--smoking >ptui<--but I own and set out for use ashtrays for guests who smoke. I ask only that they not do so in the beds. Hard to un-stinkify those. I won’t eat the veggie diet (even though, don’t tell anyone, I like veggies a lot and eat more of them than I do meat shhhh) almost entirely because I abhor being preached at by health nuts. “Heart benefits, no more risks of this or that,blahblahblah,” and yet oddly enough several of the preachers died of cancer. One pancreatic, allegdly related to one’s diet; hmmm. Two others of lung cancer, being smokers. The irony of that escaped them even into their final hours. And my mother’s mother died of a stroke after being a vegetarian for 9 years. She had horribly high cholesterol...never went down on this oh-so-healthy diet...and she’s the one who convinced me to go macrobiotic before she conked. Two years and my first attack of gout later, I said pfui and went bonkers. No better, no worse back then. Lately, I’m paying for all the years of alcohol abuse, diabetes y’know.
RMJ and Helga: Babies are too easily made and too easily mistreated. I wish people who wanted kids wanted to learn how they shold raise them so as not to screw them up beyond the irretrievable minimum of damage. Such a Utopian dreamer I am.
Hey Helga, sounds like a lovely summer day...a friend of mine in Florida is childless by choice and she gets a lot of pitying glances and “awwws” when people our age (later 40s-plus) gather and discuss grandkids and such-like. She listens politely and makes every attempt to dodge the inevitable question: “And your kids?” But she never lies, just says, “I never married, and never had kids.” How unbelieveably arrogant people are, assuming their happiness is ours! “Oh dear, I’m sorry” or “Could you not have kids?” or, memorably, “Are you a lesbian?” This is the same friend who, when we have dinner together, always insists on paying with HER credit card, which SHE hands to the waitperson...and 9 times in 10, the waitperson of either gender brings the card back to ME to be signed! I always ask, “Do I look like someone who should be named Elizabeth?”
Folks are funny, no?
Hello Glen, Mew what a wealth of interesting stuff! Lames, how’s it hangin’ m’boy? I think that’s all for now...did I say hey to Hawk already? Back to editing this severed-head story. I’m not too jazzed about my chances of winning. Anyone else have a short story to enter?
Posted by Mudge on from Dear, dead Austin 12/09 at 07:15 PMSucks, Keir. Guess youth is stupid everywhere. I know I was.
DELIGHTED the laptop survived, and you’re not too badly hurt.
Posted by Mudge on from Dear, dead Austin 12/09 at 07:20 PMGlad you’re OK, Keir...it does usually take a few days to let something like that sink in.
Hello all...it sure got busy here while I was gone! Glad to see it.
Posted by JOS on from PR 12/09 at 07:28 PMIt’s definitely Bigfoot, Mick. Anyone ever seen Tenacious D’s Bigfoot skit?
I’ll be back in a couple of hours...I hope some of this crowd is still around.
Posted by JOS on from PR 12/09 at 07:34 PMOnly time for a quick hello. Keir, what happened to you really sucks but, to echo others here, it’s good you weren’t hurt worse and your laptop is still in your possession.
One other brief note: Mudge used the term “health nuts” but I find that one particularly hilarious. If I choose to exercise and not smoke or eat junk food, I’m nuts? Would anyone who does smoke or drink alcohol or eat at McDonald’s want me to call them a disease nut?
Captcha sez: Truth.
Gotta run. Be back later.
P.S. Good to see you, Big Country.
Posted by Mickey Z. on from Astoria 12/09 at 07:51 PMcredit where credits due:that is a good riposte.
we did sevens a few weeks ago (i have a strange memory - remember coversation verbatim from 10 years ago but not what day it is etc etc)
7 good ripostes…
1. what a shame, 3 million sperm and you had to be the fastest.
2. we all have something to bring to this discussion but from now on i think YOU should bring silence.
3. if you keep trying to think of replies you are going to confuse your other brain cell
4. you’ve got a video fo your own conception in your house and everything haven’t you?
5. [this one is convoluted but works particularly well] in discussion with somebody who is talking nonsense you start fishing in your wallet whilst still nodding appreciatively then pull out a stamp and a pen and say
“look, there is the back of a stamp. write everything you know about politics/football/literature (basically insert insult here) on it.
6. [never had the heart to do this to my students but often thought about it] mid conversation start looking under the table, around the floor, at the board and say “sorry i was looking for the relevance”
7. shut the f*ck up (couldn’t think of anything else right now)i really should mind my ‘language’
Posted by michael on from scotland 12/09 at 08:14 PMToo many babies? Son of a ...! Why didn’t you post this a year ago? That tears it, I’m going to have to sell my boy to scientific experiments and there is nothing to be done about it. Besides, I’ll have to admit his cheerful gurgling and mile wide smile were becoming irksome.
My wife and I thought long and hard about children. It came down to one thing. Hope.
Even a dullard like myself is aware of the expanding population and it’s grinding down of the Earth’s resources. I have only just recently set out to live a simpler, more socially responsible lifestyle, thanks in part to websites like this one, and I’m seriously flirting with vegetarianism. Lentils, have mercy on me, can veganism be far behind?My son will live and breath the “live simply, so that others may simply live” philosophy that took me 40 years to embrace. My son will be part of the solution to the world’s problems in whatever way his talents allow. This is the hope he embodies. And will be exposed to wisdom and insight of the Expendables from the get go!
If my son doesn’t realize my hope, THEN he’s off to scientific experiments!
As for things Scottish, back in ‘94 I worked on a local soccer program produced by a friend of mine. Since the World Cup was being played in the US, we interviewed all the ambassadors of countries that were participating. I’ll always remember the day we went to videotape the Irish ambassador. At the embassy my friend and I were greeted by some lackey who asked our names. When I told him my name, he quickly said,” Oh, your last name is Scottish not Irish.” Excuse me? Since I didn’t remember asking his opinion of my last name, I was slightly put off. Since I can trace both Scottish and Irish ancestry on both sides of my family I was even more slightly put off. Since I couldn’t see a reason why I would rather be Irish than Scottish I was magnitudes more slightly put off. Pretentious prick.
Worse yet, when we went to the Bulgarian embassy, we were met by a lackey who asked our names. When I told him my name, he quickly said, “Oh, your last name is Scottish not Irish.”As for the Sasquatch photo, I can here him now, “How high do I have to go to take a shit in peace?”
Posted by Cart on from near Warshington DC 12/09 at 08:16 PMKeir - sorry to hear about your street trouble.
The Dutch are big people, I thought - and I’m 6’2”. My friend Dick Noonan, ( about 5’9” ) with whom I traveled, always looked around, saying: “Jesus, Look at all these fucking ‘Svens!’”
I got “shouldered” very hard in the street, in Amsterdam. Didn’t see it coming. I got the better of our collision, however, so the guys just yelled at us, from a distance, when Dick and I turned to face them. Tough people. And, you’re right, tough planet. I have spent many hundreds of hours walking about in big cities. I have seen that, generally, when my mood is “upbeat,” the city is upbeat. When I’m down, and particularly, when I’m angry, the city takes its shots at me… Unfortunately, I was angry almost all the time, up till the last few years.Mickey, I like your plan. My retirement plan is to smoke Opium, each April, in Charleston. Is that gonna fly, or should I reschedule?
Re: Health & Disease Nuts: No to both. Can’t we just be goofy people, each with our own ways, our own successes and failures, our own absurd delights? As long as we don’t hurt each other, I think we can…Michael, I’ve always been fascinated by the way officials and organizations will leap over themselves, and spare no expense to help someone in one of those weird situations, such as being lost on a mountain. Fall down a well, get stuck up a tree, get lost in the wilderness - and you’re all set. On their way to the scene, the search and rescue crews, equipment, and vehicles of all sorts may pass hundreds, even thousands of dirt poor, malnourished, lost, abused people, desperate for any sort of helping hand.
For this, we haven’t even so much as a suggestion.Elizabeth - Oh, no, I mean, Mudge. Sorry.
Mudge, raising kids is so hard, so hard… I can’t find words to describe the experience. It can be rewarding at times, of course, but it’s frequently more brutal than most folks can imagine. “Love” relationships are a hint at how hard it is, but - honestly! - only a hint. No one is ready to be a parent… Once one is in that situation, one may be lucky or not… but it will be brutally difficult, either way. The young guy executed in Maryland (see my link above), was the son of a girl who was raped at 13… He was doomed even before he was born…Posted by joe on from Oregon 12/09 at 08:25 PMMichael, your list sounds like a recap of all the conversations which took place in my high school. Sti the shivers.
Cart - ( Cart… Cart… that’s Scottish, isn’t it?)
- Cart, I wish you well. You have the right attitude… hang on tight, my friend. Make lots of loving memories, when they’re tiny - that you might call on them, later, when you’re feeling both murderous and suicidal.Love them relentlessly - even when it seems impossible to do so, even when it seems stupid to do so, even when… especially when you just can not - and you’ll have a good chance.
Hey, Big Country! Very good to see ya. Be careful down there. I’ve heard there are elements not entirely supportive of US control of the island…
Posted by joe on from Oregon 12/09 at 08:37 PMOn children: I’m at that age (29) at which everyone around me seems to be having kids. Few of them are planned. I just don’t see the sense at the moment in brining children into this mess. I’m not saying I don’t see the beauty in life. I do. But, here, an experiment Mr. Vonnegut himself might support: imagine aliens landing here and trying to explain to them how wonderful life here on earth is.
Stick it to ‘em Mickey---there’s nothing nuts about actively persuing alternatives to the readily available poisons that purport to be edible at the store.
As for the height of my new wrestling partners: Joe, I’m not a big guy, and the kids who put my back out today were probably first-generation immigrants, from Morocco perhaps. Short, like me. But violent little drunks they were.
2:48 on Saturday morning. Till later all.
Posted by Keir on from The Hague 12/09 at 08:40 PMi never said any of it was constructive
Posted by michael on from scotland 12/09 at 08:40 PMRandom replies...since I’ve lost all ability to assign answers to specific questions or Expendables:
What’s the going rate for selling a kid for scientific experiments these days?
April is now officially National Opium Month.
Anyone in the Netherlands over the height of six-foot-one will be arrested on sight...except those named Elizabeth.
Health and disease nuts will be sold in bulk alongside the cashews.
Did they invent Scot Tissue in Glasgow, too?
Finally, if I am so inclined, I can monitor how people find this site. For example, some do Google searches for some rather odd topics but the combination of words they use land them in Expendable Territory. For example, today, someone got here by typing in the words “vegan atheist artist.” Yesterday, it was “Tookie is a nigger.” You can learn a lot about people through Google, huh?
Posted by Mickey Z. on from Astoria 12/09 at 09:05 PMmudge - u have a kindred spirit. i came across it and i thought it was you - VERY shortly after i arrived at mickeys. but the guy is superb. the sarchastic ‘news 2020’ section is a treat for anyone who bothers.
http://thecurmudgeonly.blogspot.com
Posted by michael on from scotland 12/09 at 09:06 PMsorry mickey, was typing while u posted. i am still a luddite when it comes to this stuff. let me know here or somewhere else how you would go about finding out such things.
and i know some of you find the invention stuff laughable but it is true. some of them were invented by scottish people in england or the US (emigrating is the other national sport) which is why some of it is tenous but not second or third generation. all of the things i mentioned were from people born and raised here (sometimes with other peoples money). i could name names. would that be ‘wrong’
Posted by michael on from scotland 12/09 at 09:12 PMMy way of saying thanks to Michael for his “recent” help: http://tinyurl.com/5co5m
Posted by Mickey Z. on from Astoria 12/09 at 09:38 PMSigning off at 9:49 pm from the People’s Republic of Astoria.
Posted by Mickey Z. on from Astoria 12/09 at 09:49 PMi was going to post that one this morning but its way too tenuous.
i know i have been ‘of a theme’ today and i promise it won’t happen tomorrow. just stuff with seeing cindy sheehan being ignored by our own little shit of a ‘leader’ pissed me off and got me thinking down a certain not necessarliy wholesome avenue.
this is the last thing i’ll say about it. Owen hasn’t been around much lately but he will know what i am on about.
noam once said “the world looks very different from which end of the gun you are at” - scotland and ireland are next to england. two countries, not that much smaller but less than 10%of the population. so they get bullied. it happens. its not an exclusive story. these lyrics from an irish band sum it up well -the sergeant is the englishman…
As I was walking down the road
A feeling fine and larky oh
A recruiting sergeant came up to me
Says he, you’d look fine in khaki oh
For the king he is in need of men
Come read this proclamation oh
A life in flanders for you then
Would be a fine vacation ohThat may be so says I to him
But tell me sergeant dearie-oh
If I had a pack stuck upon my back
Would I look fine and cheerie oh
For they’d have you train and drill until
They had you one of the frenchies oh
It may be warm in flanders
But it’s draughty in the trenches ohThe sergeant smiled and winked his eye
His smile was most provoking oh
He twiddled and twirled his wee mustache
Says he, I know you’re only joking oh
For the sandbags are so warm and high
The wind you won’t feel blowing oh
Well I winked at a cailin [nice young female] passing by
Says i, what if it’s snowing ohCome rain or hail or wind or snow
I’m not going out to flanders oh
There’s fighting in dublin[glasgow,edinburgh,cork etc] to be done
Let your sergeants and your commanders go
Let englishmen fight english wars
It’s nearly time they started oh
I saluted the sergeant a very good night
And there and then we parted ohoff this theme tomorrow. apologies.
night night
keir. hope its ok.
Posted by michael on from scotland 12/09 at 09:56 PMMichael, if you were responding to my mention of your list - it was my high school I was disparaging, not your list. And, thanks for the curmudgeonly link… delightful spot. Oh, and by the way, I believed you - about the inventions, etc… Though, I don’t think Scotland invented Neptune. I think that was the Finns.
Keir - ah yesss, the demon of drink.
My wife once read me a piece about alcohol’s involvement in many of our modern “plagues.” Huge numbers of fights and attacks on women and children, violent crimes of almost every sort, a high percentage of car accidents, a high percentage of boating accidents, a significant percentage of divorces, every sort of injury, weird relationships you’d never think of, and which I can’t recall… the list just kept on going. She said something about an even longer, more significant list in Russia.
Most of the violence I’ve experienced in my life was in high school. Number Two? Bars.
Once had a beer bottle smashed across my face in a shit-kicker bar in North Chicago. When I stood up, holding a pool cue above my head as a weapon, the bartender was aiming a big handgun at my face. The barrel seemed to be enormous…
Before I was taken off to the hospital, the bartender said: “Yeah, we get a lot of that, here.”
I used to try to detour around bars, but there are just too many of them. I guess I have no intelligent advice, whatsoever. However, I sure feel badly about it, Kier. We’re with you, my friend, though I’m not sure what the hell that means.Mickey - thanks again for this place. Sleep well.
Posted by joe on from Oregon 12/09 at 10:25 PMhi im mohan i am having problems.
http://ford-f150-2006.blogspot.com/2008/04/1957-chevrolet-for-sale-southeast-usa.html 1957 chevrolet for sale southeast usa. Used dune buggies for sale blog orthotic materials dry ling goodyear account online southeast technical group inc messageboards about sex swim n play http://ford-f150-2006.blogspot.com/2008/04/antenta-installment-lexus-rx400-anceint.html Antenta installment lexus rx400. Anceint greek sculptures on or in buildings dark moor gates of obliviian lyrics broken seether chrome plating ga balestier hill primary school d-worm tape worm tabs bredeman lexus http://ford-f150-2006.blogspot.com/2008/04/honda-civic-del-sol-honda-civic-story.html Honda civic del sol. Honda civic story the first generation honda civic with a wheelbase of cm arrived in july the -door (called civic ferio in japan) on a cm wheelbase, the cr-x (called del sol http://ford-f150-2006.blogspot.com/2008/04/mars-rover-unusual-pictures-media.html Mars rover unusual pictures. Media attention since they first landed on mars down for the martian night, they send us pictures surprises a lot of people, but it s not so unusual on this team—other roverPosted by Manolis on from Namibia, Durham 04/13 at 09:04 AM
Next entry: I was too amused to be afraid
Previous entry: A quarter-century without John, B&N pictures, some vegan news, and Jean Jacques rocks
Copyright © 2005-2007 Mickey Z.
