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Mickey Z
Cool Observer
the Department of Homeland Security.
Saturday, September 10, 2005
Shocking the curbside audience
Before we get to Storytelling Saturday, I have an urgent news flash from our fearless leader:
Meanwhile, they’re shooting dogs in Louisiana: http://tinyurl.com/9n73s
Plus there’s the specter of military dictatorship: http://tinyurl.com/7bntx
We now return to our regularly scheduled program…
It’s at the corner of 42nd Street and Second Avenue, watching the suits-and-ties stepping past me off the curb, that I’m reminded of something two of my friends once did in a comparable situation. It was the type of thing that not only adds some chaos to the daily routine we humans dub “life” but provides good material for Storytelling Saturday.
Once upon a time, it was lunchtime…and my pals Damian and Monroe are cruising in Damian’s jeep. Damian double-parks on a crowded city street to use an ATM...telling Monroe that if a cop comes along, he should drive around the block to avoid getting a ticket. Right on cue, a traffic cop appears.
(That’s Damian)
Damian exits the ATM and sees that Monroe is gone. Unconcerned, he waits at the corner for him along with a zillion frenzied New Yorkers anxiously waiting to cross. When he sees the jeep approaching, Damian spontaneously pretends to be hitch-hiking. Catching on immediately, Monroe plays along and pulls over near him.
“Need a ride?” he asks.
“Yeah.”
“How far you going?”
“Pretty far. Do you mind driving me?”
“Hey, I don’t care, pal,” Monroe suddenly yells, shocking the curbside audience. “But I’m pretty fuckin’ tired. Do you wanna drive? Yeah, how about this? If you want a fuckin’ lift, you have to drive. How ’bout that, ya bastid?”
With that, Monroe dramatically gets out of the jeep, hands Damian the keys, and plops himself into the passenger seat. Damian casually thanks him, hops into the driver’s seat, and they screech away...leaving a batch of lunchtime pedestrians so perplexed that they haven’t noticed the light has changed (that is awfully perplexed, I might add).
The End
Someone, anyone...tell us a story.
+++
If coming up with a story to tell has your brain fried, fear not...all you need is a Cranium Cooler.
http://tinyurl.com/bbwsk
Or maybe you’d just rather slap a clown?
http://tinyurl.com/34j6x
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